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the meritocratic system is shit
Tuesday, April 10, 2012
and im tired.
i vaguely remember the time when i was a docile, quiet kid at school. and then the opportunities came along, and ever since then the primal competitive instincts in me was sort of awakened. it has since been a constant fight for positions and chances to prove myself.
a rat race.
.. what for?
perhaps, a fair fighting chance for when i need a job. perhaps, for mom to have something to brag about to friends and relatives. perhaps, to prove my childhood rival wrong. idk. but when you question it, it suddenly feels so meaningless. just like a lot of other things.
systems that force these kinds of competitive instincts out of people are really horrible. meritocratic systems as in hwachong. the NUS bell-curve. the world would be a much better place if everyone was willing to share their knowledge with other people. without fear of the other person knowing more than you and besting you in the exams. we take modules because we want to learn about something. not because we need to pull up our grades by stepping on other people.
im just hoping for the day when i can stop fighting for all these. i want to earn enough money to buy a house and a car for myself. and then settle down somewhere, and spend the rest of my days taking care of my kids, writing stuff, watching drama series, baking things, creating or painting.
i just want to lie down in a beautiful meadow one day and sleep peacefully in the warm afternoon breeze.
Tuesday, April 10, 2012
and im tired.
i vaguely remember the time when i was a docile, quiet kid at school. and then the opportunities came along, and ever since then the primal competitive instincts in me was sort of awakened. it has since been a constant fight for positions and chances to prove myself.
a rat race.
.. what for?
perhaps, a fair fighting chance for when i need a job. perhaps, for mom to have something to brag about to friends and relatives. perhaps, to prove my childhood rival wrong. idk. but when you question it, it suddenly feels so meaningless. just like a lot of other things.
systems that force these kinds of competitive instincts out of people are really horrible. meritocratic systems as in hwachong. the NUS bell-curve. the world would be a much better place if everyone was willing to share their knowledge with other people. without fear of the other person knowing more than you and besting you in the exams. we take modules because we want to learn about something. not because we need to pull up our grades by stepping on other people.
im just hoping for the day when i can stop fighting for all these. i want to earn enough money to buy a house and a car for myself. and then settle down somewhere, and spend the rest of my days taking care of my kids, writing stuff, watching drama series, baking things, creating or painting.
i just want to lie down in a beautiful meadow one day and sleep peacefully in the warm afternoon breeze.
posted by ct
post-DU; 2012
Thursday, April 5, 2012
YEAHHHH DU IS OVERRRRR!!!
and now that i look back i must say i'm really glad to have joined the two items. (: NO REGRETS!!!
1. FAZUL's RISK!
hiphop item ftw!! <3
was actually ultra excited about the concept since chingay when i listened to the preliminary track. then i was impressed by the choreography, cos it seems to encompass so many different styles. i could feel that it'll be a really good learning opportunity!
and can i comment that i was actually secretly happy to be one of the hostages cos can change into a different set of clothes & dance the couple dance hahahhaha.
BUT! turns out the quick changing part was HELL. i was late almost every time!! even though i already unbuttoned my pants from the start of the krumping song (i was damn worried it'll fall halfway through, oh gosh, thank god it didn't) and brought an extra pair of shoes that are easier to change into.
at one point i seriously considered running out barefooted. but what nic said really stunned me. 'what kind of attitude is that! you're not dancing contemp!' so no matter how little time i had during the actual show i made sure to put on my shoes before running out.
and i LOVED the couple song choreography!! they taught us separately, but when we needed to combine somehow everything just fits together!!! takes how much brainpower to choreograph these kind of stuff can. i think i can never manage it.
thanks to my awesome partner it went quite well i guess!! one plus point was, the lift was totally effortless on my part hahaha.
didn't really get to talk much though. because we were both sick & so mostly coughing.
sometimes, when you get used to something, your attitude towards it changes somehow. coupled with influence from people who've already done the same thing countless times before, it's really easy to get carried away. you feel more laxing about the rules, the timing, even the attitude.
and that's what shit happens and people's perception towards you changes. what i need to seek now is, the exhilaration and excitement that always comes with trying out something new. (:
and... pleas for attention deserve to go unnoticed. sometimes there's really no need to address childish complaints. on a related note, immature rantings really shouldn't appear on social media too often.
video below! courtesy of elise, best friend-slash-audience-slash-videographer!! :D
PS: left side first row for second/krumping song, left side second row for couple dance, and somewhere behind on the right side for the last/locking song (but don't think can see la haha)!!
2. DAT's SLAVE 4 U!! <3
hahaha heard that the reason why dat decided to choreograph a slut item is cos he got bored of contemp! how cool is that. joined at first cos sam & kelly were in the item, but grew to love the item SO MUCH!!!!! <3
firstly cos it's a new genre to me (okay la it's not like i've tried anything else other than contemp and hiphop) and secondly cos it's dat, the cutest choreographer ever!!! all the 'girls, let's do split-ting' and 'hi~~' and the way he pwns us all in slut moves. and thirdly, the point that im secretly happy about is that: this dance is like full of super chio/hot girl dancers!! im like how glad to be part of it!! :D
and sam kelly and joyce!! omg my fave girls.
and to prove my point that this dance is full of ultra CHIO and ZAI dancers, here are some more photos:
incidentally, i think the four of them can win best expressions in our item, hands down. there's just so much to learn from each of them!
this item is actually the one that i've both loved and feared (please disregard the corniness) - i enjoyed the dance style because it doesn't require as much energy as hiphop, and doesn't have such strict demand of lines cf contemp. i learnt though that acting and expressions is everything to a slut item!
oh almost forgot about my costume. my costume was a leopard-print tube dress, so i had to plaster double-sided tape all over my bra to make sure it didn't fall. and parts of my flesh too. which i later realized was a grave mistake cos it simply turned out to be a brutal hair removal tool... never again.
video here!
PS: mainly on the left! (:
3. DU: CONCLUSIONS.
it was great fun, and i definitely learnt a lot about dancing, made some new friends, etc., BUT i think 2 items for DU is really kinda taxing and stressful. not because of the items themselves but the amount of my time in sem 2 spent dancing. not to mention my fiesta item that was just over about a week ago!
but anyway, i definitely HAVE to comment about YEN NGEE'S ITEM. it was full of really good dancers who had incredibly genuine expressions and beautiful lines, the song was really moving, and each of the dancers had their own moment in the spotlight. the formations and blockings were perfect and each more creative than the other, and i was especially stunned by the mirror formation. the perfectly symmetrical visual effect created by the twins was simply mindblowing.
i actually asked twinnies whether they actually practiced a lot to look like perfect mirror-images of each other for that entire part. and they said maybe cos they're twins so they have good chemistry, similar build and they can spend time to practise tgt and adjust their lines accordingly. the fact that they were able to achieve the exact same effect every single time would definitely have taken a lot of effort behind the scenes. so how about that. already zai dancers + hardwork = a 200% item.
and all that, coupled with the powerful, expressive choreography, the item brought tears to my eyes every time by the end of every run i watched in the audience seats. it's hard for me to express how much i actually loved the item. it made me realize how powerful contemp items can be, and inspired me to join contemp items again for next year's DP or DU. (:
on a side note, as a result of too much dance pracs, my little toenail came off a few days ago!! ): weird that it wasn't really painful though. and somehow my toe sensed that and started regrowing it. feels like a soft but thick layer of dead skins. sorry for the description haha its just too fascinating!!
but thanks to so much dancing this sem of mine is like how screwed! really do hope that i survive this sem unscathed.. isn't really looking good though. and when such an extreme optimist like me says that, something's really wrong ): not to mention i didn't even finish my readings for almost all my midterms?! D: even though i did manage to scrape satisfactory grades i can't help but feel scared for my finals. RAWR.
hah but whatever! no regrets for joining DU cos i really danced my heart out for it! was really glad to have put on a good show for all my friends who came to watch. :D
Thursday, April 5, 2012
YEAHHHH DU IS OVERRRRR!!!
and now that i look back i must say i'm really glad to have joined the two items. (: NO REGRETS!!!
1. FAZUL's RISK!
 |
| ZUL! one of the brains behind the awesome concept heheh. |
was actually ultra excited about the concept since chingay when i listened to the preliminary track. then i was impressed by the choreography, cos it seems to encompass so many different styles. i could feel that it'll be a really good learning opportunity!
and can i comment that i was actually secretly happy to be one of the hostages cos can change into a different set of clothes & dance the couple dance hahahhaha.
 |
| DESMY!!! fellow girl hostage who understands my pain. |
at one point i seriously considered running out barefooted. but what nic said really stunned me. 'what kind of attitude is that! you're not dancing contemp!' so no matter how little time i had during the actual show i made sure to put on my shoes before running out.
 |
| casey!! awesome (and buff! walaoeh) partner. |
thanks to my awesome partner it went quite well i guess!! one plus point was, the lift was totally effortless on my part hahaha.
didn't really get to talk much though. because we were both sick & so mostly coughing.
 |
| FAZ!! abit scared of him at first but as it turns out, he's actually quite nice. shhh. |
and that's what shit happens and people's perception towards you changes. what i need to seek now is, the exhilaration and excitement that always comes with trying out something new. (:
and... pleas for attention deserve to go unnoticed. sometimes there's really no need to address childish complaints. on a related note, immature rantings really shouldn't appear on social media too often.
video below! courtesy of elise, best friend-slash-audience-slash-videographer!! :D
PS: left side first row for second/krumping song, left side second row for couple dance, and somewhere behind on the right side for the last/locking song (but don't think can see la haha)!!
2. DAT's SLAVE 4 U!! <3
hahaha heard that the reason why dat decided to choreograph a slut item is cos he got bored of contemp! how cool is that. joined at first cos sam & kelly were in the item, but grew to love the item SO MUCH!!!!! <3
 |
| hot girls sluttin' it out |
firstly cos it's a new genre to me (okay la it's not like i've tried anything else other than contemp and hiphop) and secondly cos it's dat, the cutest choreographer ever!!! all the 'girls, let's do split-ting' and 'hi~~' and the way he pwns us all in slut moves. and thirdly, the point that im secretly happy about is that: this dance is like full of super chio/hot girl dancers!! im like how glad to be part of it!! :D
and sam kelly and joyce!! omg my fave girls.
 |
| joyce! best freshie dancer in our item imo!! (with her smexy tattoo!!) |
 |
| <3 super cute sam who looked like a doll!! (with her boomz hair!) |
 |
| and pretty BRO-KELLY!!! (: (why ur face so small walao!!) |
and to prove my point that this dance is full of ultra CHIO and ZAI dancers, here are some more photos:
incidentally, i think the four of them can win best expressions in our item, hands down. there's just so much to learn from each of them!
this item is actually the one that i've both loved and feared (please disregard the corniness) - i enjoyed the dance style because it doesn't require as much energy as hiphop, and doesn't have such strict demand of lines cf contemp. i learnt though that acting and expressions is everything to a slut item!
oh almost forgot about my costume. my costume was a leopard-print tube dress, so i had to plaster double-sided tape all over my bra to make sure it didn't fall. and parts of my flesh too. which i later realized was a grave mistake cos it simply turned out to be a brutal hair removal tool... never again.
video here!
PS: mainly on the left! (:
3. DU: CONCLUSIONS.
it was great fun, and i definitely learnt a lot about dancing, made some new friends, etc., BUT i think 2 items for DU is really kinda taxing and stressful. not because of the items themselves but the amount of my time in sem 2 spent dancing. not to mention my fiesta item that was just over about a week ago!
but anyway, i definitely HAVE to comment about YEN NGEE'S ITEM. it was full of really good dancers who had incredibly genuine expressions and beautiful lines, the song was really moving, and each of the dancers had their own moment in the spotlight. the formations and blockings were perfect and each more creative than the other, and i was especially stunned by the mirror formation. the perfectly symmetrical visual effect created by the twins was simply mindblowing.
 |
| MIRROR IMAGE!!! omg. (photo koped from fb) |
i actually asked twinnies whether they actually practiced a lot to look like perfect mirror-images of each other for that entire part. and they said maybe cos they're twins so they have good chemistry, similar build and they can spend time to practise tgt and adjust their lines accordingly. the fact that they were able to achieve the exact same effect every single time would definitely have taken a lot of effort behind the scenes. so how about that. already zai dancers + hardwork = a 200% item.
and all that, coupled with the powerful, expressive choreography, the item brought tears to my eyes every time by the end of every run i watched in the audience seats. it's hard for me to express how much i actually loved the item. it made me realize how powerful contemp items can be, and inspired me to join contemp items again for next year's DP or DU. (:
on a side note, as a result of too much dance pracs, my little toenail came off a few days ago!! ): weird that it wasn't really painful though. and somehow my toe sensed that and started regrowing it. feels like a soft but thick layer of dead skins. sorry for the description haha its just too fascinating!!
but thanks to so much dancing this sem of mine is like how screwed! really do hope that i survive this sem unscathed.. isn't really looking good though. and when such an extreme optimist like me says that, something's really wrong ): not to mention i didn't even finish my readings for almost all my midterms?! D: even though i did manage to scrape satisfactory grades i can't help but feel scared for my finals. RAWR.
 |
| been in this mode for all my papers this sem. |
hah but whatever! no regrets for joining DU cos i really danced my heart out for it! was really glad to have put on a good show for all my friends who came to watch. :D
posted by ct
to appease
Monday, April 2, 2012
Monday, April 2, 2012
never would i have thought i'd one day become collateral damage in the political playground.
i was given hope early on. that i looked forward to, had in mind all the time and was thinking of how to give my all and do it as perfectly as possible. but due to unforeseen circumstances the job has to be given to someone else instead.
so i ended up with nothing.
i don't need any consolation prizes or appeasement, though. it's either the role that i think i can really contribute most in, or naught.
it's something for me to ponder about though. why would people think that i can't contribute as much? why is the role i think im most suited for already filled up by someone else? what is it that the person has that i lack? such that all my experiences and merits were to mean nothing at all?
it's always the blunt truth that hurts. in my case, it's definitely become a double-edged sword.
looks like i'll have to rethink my plans for the upcoming year. perhaps plans for my third year too.
guess there's no point dwelling on something that has never been, and will never be yours. it's a shame that i actually put in so much thought on the matter. lesson learnt: never assume anything.
and i'm stronger than that.
so why am i crying?
posted by ct
of hall culture vs sports.
Friday, January 13, 2012
Friday, January 13, 2012
of hall life I. inherent problems
thinking about hall life again.
have grown to love so many people in hall. fellow freshies, the lovely bunch of B3/B4 seniors, choir friends, PS coursemates, fellow DP dancers, awesome choreographers, etcetc.
yet after talking to quite a number of fellow freshies i thought about some inherent problems with eusoff. like the over-focus in sports. the seemingly diminishing cultural scene. the unsaid but ever-present social obligations. like how there are no secrets or and very little personal space.
and then, some of us realized that our batch kinda suck. like got very little talented dancers singers or sportspeople, and a lot of the more talented ones won't have enough points to stay on.
so we were kinda depressed about the hall's future in these two or three years. when the superawesome dancer seniors all graduate, what if the DP in two years' time becomes so cui that they decide to cancel it altogether!
of hall life II. like a cui!
came to a realization that i kinda suck when i started taking over as choir section leader. like after 6 years of not touching the piano plus i only really started singing this year then suddenly i have to teach my fellow altos how to sing some songs. i can't imagine how it would be like when the senior choir leaders all step down. it will be how cui!
plus quite a few of the cultural talents i know are all moving out. because the cultural scene here seems quite disappointing to them. cf KR and sheares at least.
since i have like 100+ room bidding points it would be a waste not to stay on. plus i actually love so many people here in eusoff. if im able to, i want to continue staying in B block, join all the cultural groups, join 3 DP items, sing for all the events, pass down the legacy from my seniors' time to incoming freshies next year.
but then.
of eusoff sports.. lame
next year, if sports continues to get more and more dominant in eusoff, rather than giving in and joining sports, i would rather move out. not that im anti-sports, i actually used to play sports, but IHG to me seems utterly pointless la.
friendly interhall matches would make sense if exceptional players were to be chosen from the IHG to represent NUS or something. but at such a trivial intra-university level, such heated ferocity as the enmity between EH and TH do not make sense at all.
good sports players should join the varsity team and fight it out with other tertiary institutions at various nationals. those who don't make the cut or want to play sports in a recreational manner can play in friendly matches versus other hall players.
i wouldn't deny that inter-hall competition serves as a good source of motivation to train potential good players into varsity team players, but importing players and all that stupid politics in sports are completely unnecessary.
like how we play badminton with fellow players in the same neighborhood. there may be this uncle who is damn good at playing, and everyone can respect him for that, but there's just no need to find another uncle from another housing area to come over and beat this uncle.
and for the importance of IHG in eusoff to have ballooned to such extreme proportions is just ridiculous.
they can decrease the cultural funding all they want - there's a chance that our DP can become an Esplanade event, but IHG is definitely staying safely within the walls of NUS.
of hall life III. venture
now i suddenly got the chance to join the rag main comm. looks like joining FOCs do have its benefits. i think i'll take up the position and (perhaps) subsequently join nussu next year?
depends on how eusoff fares next year in terms of culture. if they still don't get their skewed priorities right, honestly i'd rather move out... i definitely don't wish to though. not with all my friends and memories here..
see how.
posted by ct
being too nice = looking for trouble
i think i'm too nice to people. weird people especially.
sometimes when i find someone who's deemed to be weird in some ways and was thus ostracized or despised, some stupid noble part of me would tell me that 'there might be a sad reason/past to this person's weirdness'. so when everyone else shuns the person, i would try my best to treat him/her like everyone else, turning a blind eye to any peculiarities in the person.
but more often than not, the attention-deprived pariah minorities would mistake my normal treatment for something more - when said pariah is a girl she would start to rely on me and become so dependent it's annoying, and when it's a guy... trouble ensues.
i believe this path from annoyance, discovery to a change of attitude has been walked by many. i regret to say that only now then im finally utterly convinced that.. i should not be so nice to weird people.
and i should really stop being so scared to hurt others. because i found out there are some people who just DON'T get it, and won't get it unless slammed in the face with the cold, hard truth. that being said, i really don't have the guts to tell what i wanna say to someone who thinks that he's damn friend with me and does all sorts of weird things that makes me uncomfortable. omg. and i thought he was nice in the beginning.
i totally suck la. caused so much pain to myself because of that. was screaming into my pillow and drinking and crying in exasperation.
i really really have to rectify this.
must start to ignore people i don't like. don't have to entertain everyone. and don't be scared to hurt people. because some ppl really need the wake-up call!!!
posted by ct
im tired.
Wednesday, January 11, 2012
finally i heard the words i feared, and settled it for good.
Wednesday, January 11, 2012
finally i heard the words i feared, and settled it for good.
but somehow my close friend doesn't understand what i did. because this situation is too similar to what has happened before, so the worst was assumed of me.
shit like this has happened too many times recently.
to be precise, these few days.
i'm utterly weary of such things.
really, really afraid of them.
i know what im doing for fuck's sake.
there's a living example there to show me. telling me that if you did things that way, u'd end up like that too. hated. disapproved of.
i've been accused of too many things i'm not.
and i'm getting really, really tired.
maybe it's time to move on to another chapter.
... i just want everything to be normal again.
posted by ct
life's pleasures.
Sunday, December 18, 2011
SCREW YOU BLOGGER FOR DELETING MY ENTIRE LONG POST.
SO, AS I WAS SAYING.
it's been a month and a half now, and nothing much has changed except for the fact that im now single once again. but relationship is now at the bottom of my list. when your mom allows you to spend money, it's time to consider purchasing luxury products for hedonistic indulgence and enjoyment.
so if everything goes as planned, by next jan i shall have an awesome gaming laptop that can support all the mindblowing graphics offered by video games nowadays (and doesn't overheat like my @#$%^$ ACER), a samsung galaxy nexus S, and a NEW ROOM :)
at some point i've decided that the worst mistake i've made this year was to trade my B2 single room for the E3 double room. but come to think of it i realized there are quite a few awesome seniors/friends i've got to know in E block. sans the shisha, E block isn't too bad after all.
after i move to B3 its time to start engaging the msian girls of my batch. feeling guilty that i haven't even made an effort to hang out with them before this. and as instructed by the eager msian guys, i shall try to jio them out for dinners and suppers together as a batch. let's see how the batch bonding goes! :D looking forward to cooking with the guys too hehe.
speaking of gaming laptops, im having a hard time deciding between razer and alienware.
sucks though knowing that quite a few much better laptops will be out in mid 2012. but who cares, must grab one of these babies while i have the chance to. no im not proud that im still living off my mom's allowance, unlike my hardworking friends. but i really wanna spend these few years doing and learning the stuff i like first.
i SWEAR to go into full-fledged MONEY-SUCKING mode after i graduate.
Sunday, December 18, 2011
SCREW YOU BLOGGER FOR DELETING MY ENTIRE LONG POST.
SO, AS I WAS SAYING.
it's been a month and a half now, and nothing much has changed except for the fact that im now single once again. but relationship is now at the bottom of my list. when your mom allows you to spend money, it's time to consider purchasing luxury products for hedonistic indulgence and enjoyment.
so if everything goes as planned, by next jan i shall have an awesome gaming laptop that can support all the mindblowing graphics offered by video games nowadays (and doesn't overheat like my @#$%^$ ACER), a samsung galaxy nexus S, and a NEW ROOM :)
at some point i've decided that the worst mistake i've made this year was to trade my B2 single room for the E3 double room. but come to think of it i realized there are quite a few awesome seniors/friends i've got to know in E block. sans the shisha, E block isn't too bad after all.
after i move to B3 its time to start engaging the msian girls of my batch. feeling guilty that i haven't even made an effort to hang out with them before this. and as instructed by the eager msian guys, i shall try to jio them out for dinners and suppers together as a batch. let's see how the batch bonding goes! :D looking forward to cooking with the guys too hehe.
speaking of gaming laptops, im having a hard time deciding between razer and alienware.
sucks though knowing that quite a few much better laptops will be out in mid 2012. but who cares, must grab one of these babies while i have the chance to. no im not proud that im still living off my mom's allowance, unlike my hardworking friends. but i really wanna spend these few years doing and learning the stuff i like first.
i SWEAR to go into full-fledged MONEY-SUCKING mode after i graduate.
posted by ct
need a yorkie!
Wednesday, November 2, 2011
omg i effing want a pet ))):
next sem imma get a single room. and if possible i wanna smuggle some quiet pets in. hahaha. like the hamsters in D2. and cats in D1. hey how come D block so many animals one ah.
i SOOO want a yorkie!! been wanting one since ages ago. just don't understand why pa is so against having animals in the house. after graduation i shall stay outside and keep pets of my own.
don't care! (:
Wednesday, November 2, 2011
omg i effing want a pet ))):
 |
| awww ((: meow fist! |
next sem imma get a single room. and if possible i wanna smuggle some quiet pets in. hahaha. like the hamsters in D2. and cats in D1. hey how come D block so many animals one ah.
 |
| ahhh |
i SOOO want a yorkie!! been wanting one since ages ago. just don't understand why pa is so against having animals in the house. after graduation i shall stay outside and keep pets of my own.
don't care! (:
posted by ct
omg i can feel my thigh muscles
Sunday, October 30, 2011
walao damn zi zhao i shouldn't have said i wanted to cycle more when we reached the supper place! but i rmb saying 'just don't cycle inside nus can already' leh! so i got cheated. hmph. can't rmb how many steep slopes we climbed already la. crazy shit. it really IS the national university of slopes man.
the downhill rides were quite shiok though. hahaha. oh bumps at the end of downhill slopes are quite unnerving.
so yeah got jelly legs now. but i still want to get a bike!!
i've been talking about it since JC1 pls. for me the distance between HCIBS & the college section was abit too far alr, esp for ppl like me who regularly reach my class bench 7:25am on the dot. i would always brisk-walk to school, and whenever someone breezes past me on a bike i'd stare in envy. then in the later part of J2 when i half-moved to opposite KAP it got worse cos i'll have to take bus to school and the traffic along dunearn road in the morning, is complete BULLSHIT. you won't believe it unless u've been in a jam along that stretch before.
so quoting my own post in J2:
look, i still don't have a bike now! wahahaha.
but this time i think i've convinced mom alr la. so will probably get one in a few weeks' time, if possible!
oh i wanted to review MW2 (which i finished within 1 day woots!) but i abit sian of it already. shall do that when i finish playing the two players co-op campaigns with lukey (in dec, mind you). loved the storyline & graphics btw!
Sunday, October 30, 2011
walao damn zi zhao i shouldn't have said i wanted to cycle more when we reached the supper place! but i rmb saying 'just don't cycle inside nus can already' leh! so i got cheated. hmph. can't rmb how many steep slopes we climbed already la. crazy shit. it really IS the national university of slopes man.
the downhill rides were quite shiok though. hahaha. oh bumps at the end of downhill slopes are quite unnerving.
so yeah got jelly legs now. but i still want to get a bike!!
i've been talking about it since JC1 pls. for me the distance between HCIBS & the college section was abit too far alr, esp for ppl like me who regularly reach my class bench 7:25am on the dot. i would always brisk-walk to school, and whenever someone breezes past me on a bike i'd stare in envy. then in the later part of J2 when i half-moved to opposite KAP it got worse cos i'll have to take bus to school and the traffic along dunearn road in the morning, is complete BULLSHIT. you won't believe it unless u've been in a jam along that stretch before.
so quoting my own post in J2:
I NEED A BIKE!really don't see the point of me waking up so early JUST TO GET THROUGH THE MASSIVE JAM ALONG THE STRETCH BETWEEN MY HOUSE & HWACHONG. im like the anomaly in the distance vs wake-time correlation graph. like
graph was anyhow fabricated/estimated based on anecdotal recounts. like how EMO lives far away but has a short bus route to school without jam, but still needs to wake up early to comb her hair thus the slightly earlier timing.
but i need a bike so yeah.idk when mom's gonna get over my past recklessness on the bike and buy me a new one, but every time i see bikes chained to class benches my heart shatters like *piang
i want a bike ): like this gucci one:
haha anyway i shall stop ranting about wanting a bike, since it seems rather impossible for mom to change her mind.i'll see if i can walk/briskwalk/jog/run to school instead.
look, i still don't have a bike now! wahahaha.
but this time i think i've convinced mom alr la. so will probably get one in a few weeks' time, if possible!
oh i wanted to review MW2 (which i finished within 1 day woots!) but i abit sian of it already. shall do that when i finish playing the two players co-op campaigns with lukey (in dec, mind you). loved the storyline & graphics btw!
posted by ct
cognitive dissonance
Sunday, October 23, 2011
life has been rather repetitive.
Sunday, October 23, 2011
life has been rather repetitive.
i don't like to blog about stuff i learn in school because they don't really interest me much. except for the occasionally intriguing chinese politics, the rest is just memorizing various theories and schools of thoughts, and then applying them in the assignments or term papers. class participation in political science kinda sucks too, when u realize there are damn a lot of zai kias studying pol science. and i thought an A in GP was sufficient. ha ha. there's just so much to learn.
and then it's the imbalance that i want to complain about. i really really have to sort this out before this goes on. hope i have the correct solution this time, because the previous few times i really had it all wrong.
anyway, i'm kinda tempted to join some school CCAs. before school started i actually made a list of CCAs i want to join. and now that i've been fully engulfed by the system that is Eusoff Hall, i kinda stopped thinking about the rovers club, shooting club and all the OCIP projects and how i so wanted to join. i rmb my ravings to my camp OGmates about how i die die must go on an OCIP trip by the end of this year. but now that: 1. i didn't get into expeditions and 2. i've missed all the deadlines for the school OCIP projects and 3. i have chingay, carolling and DP, they're kinda impossible already.
I actually posed this question to someone, 'what makes hall CCAs better than school CCAs' and the immediate response i got was 'nothing'. well. that coming from someone who've stayed in hall for 3 years is just depressing. said person then went on to suggest a plus point, that is people are more closely bonded when they stay in hall, but upon second thought he retracted his statement saying that it's just physical proximity; people in hall aren't that close to each other after all.
which makes it even more depressing.
when it becomes a concrete fact that you're a full-time Hall person and it's really too late to join any school CCAs, that's when u desperately start to justify ur hall stay. and the term i recently learnt applies. it's called 'cognitive dissonance'.
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Fact 1: School CCAs seem more fun.
Fact 2: I'm already staying in hall and am dedicating all my time and effort to it.
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Fact 1: School CCAs seem more fun.
Fact 2: I'm already staying in hall and am dedicating all my time and effort to it.
So I tell myself that staying in hall is damn fun and the people are nice and it's damn close to school so I save on transport and I know lots of super awesome hall people and I get to participate in fun events like DP & Chingay and I get to learn singing and dancing on a daily basis.
-->
Cognitive dissonance is a discomfort caused by holding conflicting ideas simultaneously. The theory of cognitive dissonance proposes that people have a motivational drive to reduce dissonance. They do this by changing their attitudes, beliefs, and actions. Dissonance is also reduced by justifying, blaming, and denying. - Wikipedia.
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Cognitive dissonance is a discomfort caused by holding conflicting ideas simultaneously. The theory of cognitive dissonance proposes that people have a motivational drive to reduce dissonance. They do this by changing their attitudes, beliefs, and actions. Dissonance is also reduced by justifying, blaming, and denying. - Wikipedia.
posted by ct
self improvement in progress
Thursday, October 20, 2011
finally got to learn butterfly!! YEAHH man *hums butterfly*
Thursday, October 20, 2011
finally got to learn butterfly!! YEAHH man *hums butterfly*
damn. the rag version is so nice i can't stop singing it despite all that innuendos in the lyrics'.
so here's the list of the things i'm learning:
1. hiphop dance
nic's dp item: absolutely adore this choreography. wait till i get the hang of acting GANGSTAH!!
chingay: omgomg it's BUTTERFLY!! hahha. can tell it's simplified, but the ending but-ter-fly steps still quite difficult! shall (prac)^3. oh and the new Yeah 3x is even more fun to dance than the old choreography imo!
i still want to go O sch open classes lehh ):
CY: i realized reggae steps not exactly easy yah. we can try 1 reggae OC if we die instantly then maybe can take course. hahaha.
2. contemp dance
dat's dp item: i STILL don't get the frigging spin haha. but other steps (esp those that require force) i think can do. abit scared of the costume. someone said: "u still eating supper?! aren't u in dat's item? wear very tight one leh!"
3. harmonizing
eng songs: i realized glee version of songs very nice to harmonize with. mainly because they already have ppl harmonizing the melodies HAHA i can just follow and learn.
chi songs: got very easy to harmonize meh? except 珊瑚海 and those duets the other songs like not very nice to harmonize leh. esp the minor songs.
my aim is to prac until mei and i can harmonize for each other. and when singing duets can harmonize for the guy's melody if needed. like that go K can pwn alr! hahaha. hmm but still got a long way ahead!
*runs off to find cheryl to sing together
4. acting
TS1101E is epic fail hahaha. i can't seem to write a good performance critique that's unbiased hahaha. and all the parts i get are statues, muscular guys etc. only time i thought i did well was when i directed.
5. singing
mainly CHINESE songs for K e.g. amei's, a-lin's and F.I.R songs. oh and duets. kaimin's starting to complain cos we everytime go k tgt he'll have to sing 千年之戀 with me hahaha. sorry lor the song's too nice alr! but i shall learn some new songs so that K doesn't ever get boring!! :DD
mainly CHINESE songs for K e.g. amei's, a-lin's and F.I.R songs. oh and duets. kaimin's starting to complain cos we everytime go k tgt he'll have to sing 千年之戀 with me hahaha. sorry lor the song's too nice alr! but i shall learn some new songs so that K doesn't ever get boring!! :DD
okay la enough with the spam of cultural activities. the stuff i do are getting so repetitive if i over-describe any of them there's no point in writing new posts already.
aim to join next year: a capella, band, elixer!!
RAWRR. and then move to B3.
then i can seriously die without regrets alr hahaha.
posted by ct
anger management
Thursday, October 13, 2011
this is crap. i totally lost my motivation for blogging.
what is this?!
whenever this happens i'll blog about life, and try to sound philosophical in my posts - which, in hindsight, never fails to make me go 'omg that was epic immature.' but oh wells who cares - it's 老娘's blog, so screw whoever disagrees with me.
hmm. weird that when i think 老娘 mom's face comes into mind. must be that she used the term too much already. omg i miss mom.
\\
of FB Games
one thing that has been bothering me. what's with ppl playing fb games? if you want to play just play the original games la, why settle for the simple coding and much less impressive graphics & animations within the fb frame! i really don't get it.
of Nic's item
may i comment that it looks freaking awesome up til now. i can tell that the steps has lots of underlying techniques so i still have loads to learn and improve on, but the song, concept, costume & choreographer are all absolutely awesome. yeap. i apologize for my lack of vocab but yeah. one word, AWESOME. super looking forward to the next prac. ((: im sure i'd have learnt damn a lot from nic by the end of DP!
of supper
looks like the freshman fifteen isn't just applicable to the states - if i keep on succumbing to my desire for supper every night i don't know what i'll turn into. right now my after school hours is like EAT-sing-dance-dance-EAT. notice how eat appears twice; and i don't think the dance helps a lot. so starting from yesterday i've decided that i shan't eat supper after 12pm. well, let's see how long i can last.
of photoshoot
the photos came back looking not bad! at least for the punk-rock look haha. freaking loved my hair please. i hope they give me assignments and then it's $$$ :D
of DP bash
it was last week, i think? yep last thursday. when twinnn cheryl and I turned up in green/teal/turquoise and realized that all the others didn't take the theme seriously. but who cares, i loved the green i was wearing <3
\\
oh whenever i get denied of something i think i deserve, i really SIBEH DULAN.
i finally realized that all my past achievements doesn't really matter anymore. you reach uni and you start on the same line as everyone else. which sucks because i actually thought all those leadership and CIP stuff MATTERS and i pia-ed so much for it.
turns out, it doesn't matter if you have chaired both an OCIP and a local CIP team before in JC. all that planning and HR management and decision-making don't matter at all. if you don't mix with the people, you just can't get onto the fucking OCIP team.
i think pia so much get into hwachong also not much use. everything achieved there doesn't mean shit now. all the emcee jobs i've auditioned for and gotten, all the committees i've chaired, all the publications i've been editor-in-chief for, ALL FOR FUCKING NOTHING. as if it was easy chairing anything in hwachong at all.
SMLJ.
then again, i need some anger management. if i keep on being angry at incompetent people, or myself for not being able to achieve stuff, i'm gonna end up a forever emo person.
hmm let's see. what makes me happy...
mini choir session tmr with friends! (:
new dance shoes & sweatpants! :D
awesome chingay & DP choreographies! >:)
light orange, bright yellow and grassy green stuff! <3
and... K SESSION THIS SUNDAY!! :DDDD
Thursday, October 13, 2011
this is crap. i totally lost my motivation for blogging.
what is this?!
whenever this happens i'll blog about life, and try to sound philosophical in my posts - which, in hindsight, never fails to make me go 'omg that was epic immature.' but oh wells who cares - it's 老娘's blog, so screw whoever disagrees with me.
hmm. weird that when i think 老娘 mom's face comes into mind. must be that she used the term too much already. omg i miss mom.
\\
of FB Games
one thing that has been bothering me. what's with ppl playing fb games? if you want to play just play the original games la, why settle for the simple coding and much less impressive graphics & animations within the fb frame! i really don't get it.
of Nic's item
may i comment that it looks freaking awesome up til now. i can tell that the steps has lots of underlying techniques so i still have loads to learn and improve on, but the song, concept, costume & choreographer are all absolutely awesome. yeap. i apologize for my lack of vocab but yeah. one word, AWESOME. super looking forward to the next prac. ((: im sure i'd have learnt damn a lot from nic by the end of DP!
of supper
looks like the freshman fifteen isn't just applicable to the states - if i keep on succumbing to my desire for supper every night i don't know what i'll turn into. right now my after school hours is like EAT-sing-dance-dance-EAT. notice how eat appears twice; and i don't think the dance helps a lot. so starting from yesterday i've decided that i shan't eat supper after 12pm. well, let's see how long i can last.
of photoshoot
the photos came back looking not bad! at least for the punk-rock look haha. freaking loved my hair please. i hope they give me assignments and then it's $$$ :D
of DP bash
it was last week, i think? yep last thursday. when twinnn cheryl and I turned up in green/teal/turquoise and realized that all the others didn't take the theme seriously. but who cares, i loved the green i was wearing <3
\\
oh whenever i get denied of something i think i deserve, i really SIBEH DULAN.
i finally realized that all my past achievements doesn't really matter anymore. you reach uni and you start on the same line as everyone else. which sucks because i actually thought all those leadership and CIP stuff MATTERS and i pia-ed so much for it.
turns out, it doesn't matter if you have chaired both an OCIP and a local CIP team before in JC. all that planning and HR management and decision-making don't matter at all. if you don't mix with the people, you just can't get onto the fucking OCIP team.
i think pia so much get into hwachong also not much use. everything achieved there doesn't mean shit now. all the emcee jobs i've auditioned for and gotten, all the committees i've chaired, all the publications i've been editor-in-chief for, ALL FOR FUCKING NOTHING. as if it was easy chairing anything in hwachong at all.
SMLJ.
then again, i need some anger management. if i keep on being angry at incompetent people, or myself for not being able to achieve stuff, i'm gonna end up a forever emo person.
hmm let's see. what makes me happy...
mini choir session tmr with friends! (:
new dance shoes & sweatpants! :D
awesome chingay & DP choreographies! >:)
light orange, bright yellow and grassy green stuff! <3
and... K SESSION THIS SUNDAY!! :DDDD
posted by ct
dancing it away
Sunday, October 2, 2011
went for terence's class yesterday.
Sunday, October 2, 2011
went for terence's class yesterday.
it was full of bounces again :/ my knees were still hurting from last week's bounces (nic plus terence on consecutive days = not good), so this week it's added on. oh plus the black & blue i got from dat's rolling choreo. i shld seriously stop sitting down knee-first.
but i kinda love it that i get to dance so frequently nowadays (:
oh for terence the choreo which we're supposed to showcase is actually kinda fun. but too bad i have choir on the showcase day so. gotta say good luck to the rest! :D oh and next week cos got mdis soundcheck so im gonna have to prac the tricky body wave thing on my own alr. jiayou twinnn!
after the lesson it was me, yihong & twin shopping for green clothes tgt. i was looking at this damn cute green & black top that was kinda my style, but hong was like 'it's nice, but that's not what you wear to clubbing' in a super lao jiao manner. she proceeded to hand me a see-through green top and said 'make sure you wear a black bra inside.' seriously hong! hahahaha.
then i was half-torn between going drinking with hong or going to sing K with the guys. u know, singing K is something that i absolutely cannot resist. but then hong made me an equally tempting promise about the club she was bringing me to, so i decided to go take a look.
somehow she knew the owner of the awesome club so we got free drinks all the way & got to see a whole lot of freakishly tall models. all the girls there were damn chio.. many cute guys ard too. then we went club-hopping abit. i really didn't know there were soooo many clubs ard the clarke quay area.
din know we were going clubbing so despite my best efforts of transforming my dancewear into clubwear i still looked a tad underage. to the point that i was almost denied entry into shanghai dolly. next time must really wear nicer clothes, more makeup & damn high heels.
ain't gonna be easy finding another day like this though. esp when i look at my google calendar. packed with many many different colours.
hectic week ahead.
looks like it won't be hard keeping myself busy though.
looks like it won't be hard keeping myself busy though.
posted by ct
petty rant.
Tuesday, September 27, 2011
of ability:
if you're not good at something, u gotta improve yourself. no point whining about it. no one gives a damn how inept you are at something, unless it bothers others. in which case u'll be kicked out of the way and be stepped on. sometimes ppl won't even step on you. you'll just be ignored, incredibly sadly, like little stones lining the pavement.
if you're good at something, all the more u must improve yourself. so that u can eventually attain an insurpassable, indisputable godlike position that entitles u to continue reaping all the benefits without having to do much. if u can't reach that far, simply attaining that in a small community will do. the benefits are still pretty enjoyable.
of looks:
if you're not goodlooking, do spend some time to make yourself at least presentable. if you give up on yourself, u'll just cause general disgust and ppl will shun away from you.
side note: if u did put in effort but ur sense of taste isn't rly good... ah well, best of luck to u.
if you're okay looking, pls do something cool to your hair, wear contacts/braces/accessories that will enhance your look so that at least on first look u'll give the impression to ppl that you're goodlooking.
if you're in the upper tier of okay looking, same thing applies but u shld definitely be more confident of yourself. hiding urself away behind specs/long fringes is only gonna give the first impression that u're ugly and have low self esteem, when u're actually not bad looking.
if you're really goodlooking, it's a moral obligation that u keep urself really goodlooking. we like it when we see someone who's beautiful. but if the beautiful girl grows fat it does kinda disappoint.
i thought all these were understood-ed.
anw, enough childish, selfish & incoherent rants.
there's so much more i need to do to improve myself.
Tuesday, September 27, 2011
of ability:
if you're not good at something, u gotta improve yourself. no point whining about it. no one gives a damn how inept you are at something, unless it bothers others. in which case u'll be kicked out of the way and be stepped on. sometimes ppl won't even step on you. you'll just be ignored, incredibly sadly, like little stones lining the pavement.
if you're good at something, all the more u must improve yourself. so that u can eventually attain an insurpassable, indisputable godlike position that entitles u to continue reaping all the benefits without having to do much. if u can't reach that far, simply attaining that in a small community will do. the benefits are still pretty enjoyable.
of looks:
if you're not goodlooking, do spend some time to make yourself at least presentable. if you give up on yourself, u'll just cause general disgust and ppl will shun away from you.
side note: if u did put in effort but ur sense of taste isn't rly good... ah well, best of luck to u.
if you're okay looking, pls do something cool to your hair, wear contacts/braces/accessories that will enhance your look so that at least on first look u'll give the impression to ppl that you're goodlooking.
if you're in the upper tier of okay looking, same thing applies but u shld definitely be more confident of yourself. hiding urself away behind specs/long fringes is only gonna give the first impression that u're ugly and have low self esteem, when u're actually not bad looking.
if you're really goodlooking, it's a moral obligation that u keep urself really goodlooking. we like it when we see someone who's beautiful. but if the beautiful girl grows fat it does kinda disappoint.
i thought all these were understood-ed.
anw, enough childish, selfish & incoherent rants.
there's so much more i need to do to improve myself.
posted by ct
shopping. bouncing. singing. dancing.
Sunday, September 4, 2011
i hate whining about my life.
but that's what a blog is for, so screw that.
I BOUGHT DAMN A LOT OF STUFF AT H&M!!! still damn happy about it hahaha. bought so many cool stuff for such cheap prices! i'm a happy girl when i shop. esp with my lovely TWINNN!! <3
sorry for the fb photo spam though. bet you're tired of seeing my face already. ahahaha.
and i spent damn alot in one day. oh including the 90 bucks for my brand new Altec Lansing expressionist Plus speakers!! :D freaking awesome can. i was blasting rock band songs like nobody's business ytd night hahaha.
wrt terence's class on sat, it was.. uhm. bounces again. last week we did down bounces. this week we did up bounce and forward bounce. LOL. next week im gonna have to miss the backwards bounce which is supposedly HARD omfg how now brown cow!!!
okay i seriously don't care. i want to go for open classes. i don't want to limit my weekly dance activities to freaking bounces!! even if it's terence teaching. from the mirror i can see that it's always me and twinnn who look exactly the same as terence for every movement. the rest are really really beginners. so the pace is like shit.
i know the importance of having good foundation in dance. like being able to execute the basic movements correctly. BUT i really don't see the point of spending 120 bucks learning how to do bounces. which, in every lesson, once the instructor tells us what to do we're able to do faultlessly while he corrects the rest of the class one by one. it's so lame la.
it feels damn shiok to be in a class of ppl who're good at dancing. that way you can push yourself to your max and pick up steps at a pace u can't believe u're able to reach. like the BEAST's Fiction class i went to with twinnn. it's like how shiok can, when everyone are able to do the steps after learning for a few minutes! not one person lagging behind.
i kinda want to read the lines fr the drama audition script aloud, but my roommate is sleeping. well i should be too cos it's 6am in the morning.
anyways, why does the character sound so damaged? and so many ambiguous lines with numerous ways of interpretation. in any case though, i don't think i'm suitable for any of the characters. if i wrote the script i wouldn't choose me. which reminds me of huangcheng auditions! a path not taken.
so maybe next year for drama! shall just focus on dance this year. (: and if possible, choir DP performance too haha. so intriguing that they have a need for the choir!
Day 9: 10 Favourite Bands or Artists
SHINee, 2NE1, BIGBANG;
F.I.R, Shin, Mayday;
Duffy, Lily Allen, P!nk, Rihanna.
im in the mood for blasting music by my fave bands and singing loudly along, but then again IT'S 6AM IN THE MORNING and my roommate is sleeping. ah screw my double room. I FREAKING HATE IT. please let me transfer to B2 or B3 next sem PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE -
choir welcome tea was fun. i realized i know quite a few people in choir, and that's good! shall try out for junior section leader. oh forgot to mention. i was completely puzzled as to why i'm in alto! i thought i'd be in sop. then again, i think my falsetto sucks so maybe that's why. dk if im good enough to be junior SL anw! but i'll not give up without trying! haha.
oh and i want to scream already. WHY DO I SEE HER EVERYWHERE?! omfg.
and regarding the unsolvable problem, i really don't know how. ):
long day ahead. need to travel back to JB after breakfast, and try to return to hall in time for DP dance auditions at 8pm later. keeping fingers crossed abt evening checkpoint traffic.
super looking forward to dance camp!
Sunday, September 4, 2011
i hate whining about my life.
but that's what a blog is for, so screw that.
I BOUGHT DAMN A LOT OF STUFF AT H&M!!! still damn happy about it hahaha. bought so many cool stuff for such cheap prices! i'm a happy girl when i shop. esp with my lovely TWINNN!! <3
 |
| haul for the day. damn colourful & awesome right!! <3 |
sorry for the fb photo spam though. bet you're tired of seeing my face already. ahahaha.
and i spent damn alot in one day. oh including the 90 bucks for my brand new Altec Lansing expressionist Plus speakers!! :D freaking awesome can. i was blasting rock band songs like nobody's business ytd night hahaha.
wrt terence's class on sat, it was.. uhm. bounces again. last week we did down bounces. this week we did up bounce and forward bounce. LOL. next week im gonna have to miss the backwards bounce which is supposedly HARD omfg how now brown cow!!!
okay i seriously don't care. i want to go for open classes. i don't want to limit my weekly dance activities to freaking bounces!! even if it's terence teaching. from the mirror i can see that it's always me and twinnn who look exactly the same as terence for every movement. the rest are really really beginners. so the pace is like shit.
i know the importance of having good foundation in dance. like being able to execute the basic movements correctly. BUT i really don't see the point of spending 120 bucks learning how to do bounces. which, in every lesson, once the instructor tells us what to do we're able to do faultlessly while he corrects the rest of the class one by one. it's so lame la.
it feels damn shiok to be in a class of ppl who're good at dancing. that way you can push yourself to your max and pick up steps at a pace u can't believe u're able to reach. like the BEAST's Fiction class i went to with twinnn. it's like how shiok can, when everyone are able to do the steps after learning for a few minutes! not one person lagging behind.
i kinda want to read the lines fr the drama audition script aloud, but my roommate is sleeping. well i should be too cos it's 6am in the morning.
anyways, why does the character sound so damaged? and so many ambiguous lines with numerous ways of interpretation. in any case though, i don't think i'm suitable for any of the characters. if i wrote the script i wouldn't choose me. which reminds me of huangcheng auditions! a path not taken.
so maybe next year for drama! shall just focus on dance this year. (: and if possible, choir DP performance too haha. so intriguing that they have a need for the choir!
Day 9: 10 Favourite Bands or Artists
SHINee, 2NE1, BIGBANG;
F.I.R, Shin, Mayday;
Duffy, Lily Allen, P!nk, Rihanna.
im in the mood for blasting music by my fave bands and singing loudly along, but then again IT'S 6AM IN THE MORNING and my roommate is sleeping. ah screw my double room. I FREAKING HATE IT. please let me transfer to B2 or B3 next sem PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE -
choir welcome tea was fun. i realized i know quite a few people in choir, and that's good! shall try out for junior section leader. oh forgot to mention. i was completely puzzled as to why i'm in alto! i thought i'd be in sop. then again, i think my falsetto sucks so maybe that's why. dk if im good enough to be junior SL anw! but i'll not give up without trying! haha.
oh and i want to scream already. WHY DO I SEE HER EVERYWHERE?! omfg.
and regarding the unsolvable problem, i really don't know how. ):
long day ahead. need to travel back to JB after breakfast, and try to return to hall in time for DP dance auditions at 8pm later. keeping fingers crossed abt evening checkpoint traffic.
super looking forward to dance camp!
posted by ct
half good in something? nah, no such thing.
Friday, September 2, 2011
lists first.
Day 7: 10 Of Your Favourite People (no particular order)
this overlaps with the previous list! so skip.
Day 8: 10 Things You're Ashamed Of
hahaha must i really do this!
1. my inner bimbo.
2. ability to sleep for 20 hours straight & wake up still feeling sleepy.
3. my stash of barbie dolls! omg haha.
4. having a soft spot for cute guys. aww.
5. tendency to spend too much time designing/customizing stuff.
6. don't have enough kinetic talent to excel in the field.. :/
7. my game/drama addiction!
8. fact that i tear easily.
9. love for food. junk food.
10. my relative lack of achievements/prominence during certain periods of time.
i realized that i really have a super wide range of interests, and for every field i'm interested in i'd have invested a considerable amount of time exploring about. and the things i'm passionate about would change from time to time. really hope to be able to excel in some new fields though. really haven't achieved anything since sec school.
the second-place curse. pathetic.
>> like my 388/400 for shooting. good enough to represent the school, to get a perfect 100/100 set, to have my own suit & boots & feinwerkbau. but not top on the list.
>> like my grade 6 in piano. can say i have music background, could've achieved so much more if the examiners & my piano teacher were right. but i gave up halfway. all my half-composed songs/scoresheets are still lying on top of my beautiful red wood piano.
>> like my design. was given the chance to design t-shirts, book covers, blogskins, banners, logos.. but essentially just a freelancer with a few digital designs under my belt. could've spent a bit more time and completed my oil paintings, realized my ideas for a comic series or come up with a masterpiece. like in the sims. but not enough determination.
>> like my writing. so many half-completed novels and stories in my comp. so many brilliant ideas i came across but can't be bothered to write down. if i took some time to furnish some of my writings and publish them i could already be earning royalties by now.
i could go on. there are so many abandoned projects and ideas. and i truly hate myself for that. just a little bit more time & effort, and there's a definite chance that i'm already famous & rich by this age. pianist, olympics shooter, professional designer, published author, singer, dancer, model, actress. none of which sounds impossibly out of reach. and each of which once part of my dreams, at various stages in the 19 years of my life.
i know it's like that for many other people too. those who are rich and famous are simply those who've taken a few more steps in their endeavors in a certain field. as long as you excel in one field, you're valued and worthy of attention. but for a jack of all trades and master of none, you're just another human being. the amounts of time and effort you've spent in the various different fields, if you haven't produced anything substantial or quantifiable or observable, are essentially wasted. nullified.
i wish i was home schooled. raised in the middle east. have a mafia boss as my dad. so that i wouldn't have been exposed to so many different stuff. and i'd have such unique experiences.
right now i just wish i'm backpacking in a foreign exotic land.
Friday, September 2, 2011
lists first.
Day 7: 10 Of Your Favourite People (no particular order)
this overlaps with the previous list! so skip.
Day 8: 10 Things You're Ashamed Of
hahaha must i really do this!
1. my inner bimbo.
2. ability to sleep for 20 hours straight & wake up still feeling sleepy.
3. my stash of barbie dolls! omg haha.
4. having a soft spot for cute guys. aww.
5. tendency to spend too much time designing/customizing stuff.
6. don't have enough kinetic talent to excel in the field.. :/
7. my game/drama addiction!
8. fact that i tear easily.
9. love for food. junk food.
10. my relative lack of achievements/prominence during certain periods of time.
i realized that i really have a super wide range of interests, and for every field i'm interested in i'd have invested a considerable amount of time exploring about. and the things i'm passionate about would change from time to time. really hope to be able to excel in some new fields though. really haven't achieved anything since sec school.
the second-place curse. pathetic.
>> like my 388/400 for shooting. good enough to represent the school, to get a perfect 100/100 set, to have my own suit & boots & feinwerkbau. but not top on the list.
>> like my grade 6 in piano. can say i have music background, could've achieved so much more if the examiners & my piano teacher were right. but i gave up halfway. all my half-composed songs/scoresheets are still lying on top of my beautiful red wood piano.
>> like my design. was given the chance to design t-shirts, book covers, blogskins, banners, logos.. but essentially just a freelancer with a few digital designs under my belt. could've spent a bit more time and completed my oil paintings, realized my ideas for a comic series or come up with a masterpiece. like in the sims. but not enough determination.
>> like my writing. so many half-completed novels and stories in my comp. so many brilliant ideas i came across but can't be bothered to write down. if i took some time to furnish some of my writings and publish them i could already be earning royalties by now.
i could go on. there are so many abandoned projects and ideas. and i truly hate myself for that. just a little bit more time & effort, and there's a definite chance that i'm already famous & rich by this age. pianist, olympics shooter, professional designer, published author, singer, dancer, model, actress. none of which sounds impossibly out of reach. and each of which once part of my dreams, at various stages in the 19 years of my life.
i know it's like that for many other people too. those who are rich and famous are simply those who've taken a few more steps in their endeavors in a certain field. as long as you excel in one field, you're valued and worthy of attention. but for a jack of all trades and master of none, you're just another human being. the amounts of time and effort you've spent in the various different fields, if you haven't produced anything substantial or quantifiable or observable, are essentially wasted. nullified.
i wish i was home schooled. raised in the middle east. have a mafia boss as my dad. so that i wouldn't have been exposed to so many different stuff. and i'd have such unique experiences.
right now i just wish i'm backpacking in a foreign exotic land.
posted by ct
friendship & commitment
Thursday, September 1, 2011
Day 5: 10 Things About Your Friends
1. Twinnn aka chenyi: bestie forever. we're so very much alike it's scary sometimes haha. she's really like my twin. i can't rmb how we ended up in the same clique in JC, but she's made my JC life so much more enjoyable - as we talk about guys, bitch about girls, pon stuff & organize self-initiated-mugging-sessions (SIMS) together. she introduced me to dance, and i'm eternally grateful for it. and recently i realized we never run out of topics to talk about haha. love her with all my heart! :D
2. Yihong: the walking remnant of my fangirl days - every time i talk to her it's gonna be about some guy or some idol. shared lots of crazy memorable times tgt! we've been through so much, too. admire her courage to be loud/AA and her will to fight for her own rights. she's like a pretty & bimbotic sister to me - and the love-hate relationship goes on (:
3. Yiling + XY's clique: my lovely CLL friends! perhaps the purest and cutest group of girls i'll ever met. love hanging out with them.
4. LEP Council gang: most awesome group of people i've known. let's venture out and own the chinese field man. esp LOVE zijing & sansan. 闺蜜s ftw!!
5. my geeky girl friends. one's in stanford and the other in berkeley, both studying engineering. i shall miss them alot alot in these few years. hopefully we can realize our billion-dollar ideas in the future to come.
i don't feel like completing this list cos it's kinda lame to categorize and describe my various groups of friends. for me there's a very clear line between acquaintances and friends. since i've joined so many different things in both JC and uni i've got to know a lot of different people, but there aren't many i've decided to really befriend. i've alr given up on some of my camp OGs, mainly because it takes time and effort, sometimes even money (gifts) to maintain friendships. i only hang out with ppl i like to talk to.
and say should any one of them call me up for help burying a dead body, i'll immediately rush over to help. no questions asked.
there are also new additions - my fellow rag dancers. yuting cheryl, all the wonderful msian seniors plus the year 4s. the E block girls too, are a cool bunch. but all these are ongoing, and whether we will become close friends only time will tell.
AND twin wrote another post!! i'm SO gonna quote her hahaha.
firstly to address her MJ auditions:
and secondly the part that cracked me up:
okay enough silly girl talk. time for some life updates.
went for CCA fair just now.
decided that i shall continue doing design and join EusoffWorks Design. i went there empty-handed, but i think they need ppl who can do digital design ie. illustrator & photoshop (instead of traditional paper-based medium), which is what i've always been doing, plus when i said i could do html coding i think their eyes immediately lit up. a little worried though haha. what if there are too many assignments! i have the tendency to rush design assignments through the night. so i guess it means lots of sleepless nights ahead!! but then, it's something i enjoy doing. so i don't really mind.
signed up for expedition, EHOC programmes & chingay! (: oh CEMC too but still abit unsure about it. anyway i realized that i've already kinda maxed out my cultural activities points. say one event/membership = 8 points, i now have:
Rag Dance + Chingay + Eusoff Dance + Eusoff Choir + Dance Production ie. 40 points!
so i guess i'll be following the footsteps of the msian seniors and focus my hall endeavors in the cultural aspect. next year i shall audition for band/elixer/drama or something. haha.
and seeing the no. of ppl queueing for expedition interview i doubt i'll be shortlisted, unless they are looking for ppl with OCIP experience. so if I don't get expedition i shall do EHOC. then again, EHOC points are for next year so i guess i'll still join CEMC? see if my EW points are enough. if it's 16 points then i'll have ~56 points.. ah the point system is so confusing. should i join netball too?
one thing's for sure though, i've never thought about moving out of eusoff hall ever since moving in. it's like my home now.
I HEART EUSOFF <3
oh next sat there's eusoff dance camp and the TS fear of writing show and terence's class and MAF ): howhowhow?! so screwed why does everything has to be on saturday. ah. looking forward to choir and dance though! (:
Thursday, September 1, 2011
Day 5: 10 Things About Your Friends
1. Twinnn aka chenyi: bestie forever. we're so very much alike it's scary sometimes haha. she's really like my twin. i can't rmb how we ended up in the same clique in JC, but she's made my JC life so much more enjoyable - as we talk about guys, bitch about girls, pon stuff & organize self-initiated-mugging-sessions (SIMS) together. she introduced me to dance, and i'm eternally grateful for it. and recently i realized we never run out of topics to talk about haha. love her with all my heart! :D
2. Yihong: the walking remnant of my fangirl days - every time i talk to her it's gonna be about some guy or some idol. shared lots of crazy memorable times tgt! we've been through so much, too. admire her courage to be loud/AA and her will to fight for her own rights. she's like a pretty & bimbotic sister to me - and the love-hate relationship goes on (:
3. Yiling + XY's clique: my lovely CLL friends! perhaps the purest and cutest group of girls i'll ever met. love hanging out with them.
4. LEP Council gang: most awesome group of people i've known. let's venture out and own the chinese field man. esp LOVE zijing & sansan. 闺蜜s ftw!!
5. my geeky girl friends. one's in stanford and the other in berkeley, both studying engineering. i shall miss them alot alot in these few years. hopefully we can realize our billion-dollar ideas in the future to come.
i don't feel like completing this list cos it's kinda lame to categorize and describe my various groups of friends. for me there's a very clear line between acquaintances and friends. since i've joined so many different things in both JC and uni i've got to know a lot of different people, but there aren't many i've decided to really befriend. i've alr given up on some of my camp OGs, mainly because it takes time and effort, sometimes even money (gifts) to maintain friendships. i only hang out with ppl i like to talk to.
and say should any one of them call me up for help burying a dead body, i'll immediately rush over to help. no questions asked.
there are also new additions - my fellow rag dancers. yuting cheryl, all the wonderful msian seniors plus the year 4s. the E block girls too, are a cool bunch. but all these are ongoing, and whether we will become close friends only time will tell.
AND twin wrote another post!! i'm SO gonna quote her hahaha.
firstly to address her MJ auditions:
our audition choreo was twin's open class choreo for blast.omg wts really?! he used Glad You Came by The Wanted is it! hahaha so amusing. you should totally have went for your open class man! then we could've exchanged tips and aced our respective auditions!! okay no la kidding. either way, the auditions are over alr so no point thinking about it! don't even have to find out when the results are gonna be released haha. meanwhile let's just learn at O School! i want to go for alot alot of open classes!! (:
and secondly the part that cracked me up:
anw twin's blog got this para about Aquarius which is really true.yay @dori_lukey you have a direct mention by name now! and twinnn has helped justify my reading assignment! and lol twinnn you can't sue me cos 'that would be the very definition of a frivolous lawsuit'! btw what's amusing was twinnn's coining of the term 'Mr CT'S-BOYFRIEND'. hahahaha.
haha but some parts are quite funny lol!
"Her trust arises from the fact that before committing,
she had dissected your behavior under a microscope."
HAHA! imagine twin dissecting Luke's behavior under a microscope beforehand.
totally burst out into laughter at the 'sight' of that! LOL!
really. literally imagine it and you will know what i mean!
but but its really quite true. i agreed to most of it.
so Mr Phang you know what to expect!
and twin stop quoting stuff from my blog else i will sue you for copyright!
okay enough silly girl talk. time for some life updates.
went for CCA fair just now.
decided that i shall continue doing design and join EusoffWorks Design. i went there empty-handed, but i think they need ppl who can do digital design ie. illustrator & photoshop (instead of traditional paper-based medium), which is what i've always been doing, plus when i said i could do html coding i think their eyes immediately lit up. a little worried though haha. what if there are too many assignments! i have the tendency to rush design assignments through the night. so i guess it means lots of sleepless nights ahead!! but then, it's something i enjoy doing. so i don't really mind.
signed up for expedition, EHOC programmes & chingay! (: oh CEMC too but still abit unsure about it. anyway i realized that i've already kinda maxed out my cultural activities points. say one event/membership = 8 points, i now have:
Rag Dance + Chingay + Eusoff Dance + Eusoff Choir + Dance Production ie. 40 points!
so i guess i'll be following the footsteps of the msian seniors and focus my hall endeavors in the cultural aspect. next year i shall audition for band/elixer/drama or something. haha.
and seeing the no. of ppl queueing for expedition interview i doubt i'll be shortlisted, unless they are looking for ppl with OCIP experience. so if I don't get expedition i shall do EHOC. then again, EHOC points are for next year so i guess i'll still join CEMC? see if my EW points are enough. if it's 16 points then i'll have ~56 points.. ah the point system is so confusing. should i join netball too?
one thing's for sure though, i've never thought about moving out of eusoff hall ever since moving in. it's like my home now.
I HEART EUSOFF <3
oh next sat there's eusoff dance camp and the TS fear of writing show and terence's class and MAF ): howhowhow?! so screwed why does everything has to be on saturday. ah. looking forward to choir and dance though! (:
posted by ct
rooting is taking damn long
Wednesday, August 31, 2011
so i shall blog!
some updates about my classes.
my PS1101E tutor is damn young and pretty! she's apparently a PhD student from the US, and younger than one of the guys in class somemore! so zai right. i also want do a lot with my life while i'm young, starting from the day i turn twenty which is in next Feb. wish me luck! (:
and TS practical today was damn fun. we were split into groups and given scripts with ~18 scenes. for every scene it's a freeze frame of ongoing events. had lots of fun playing the brick house pig, the straw/wood & the fire haha. i realized got quite a number of potential actresses in my class! like joyce, the goldilock girl etc. i'm like scouting for potential groupmates for the finals play alr! hahaha.
omg just how long is the shell rooting gonna take?! D:
Wednesday, August 31, 2011
so i shall blog!
Day 5: 10 Things About Your Family
1. Dad sells birds' nest. but I seldom get to eat it cos it's too mafan to cook.
2. Mom is a very strong & independent woman. really love & admire her a lot.
3. Mei's 3 years younger than I am but a whole lot more mature. we go to each other for advice, and share our deepest darkest thoughts. which is bad sometimes.
4. Mommy's my ganma & aunt whom I love very very much. she's forever glam. admire her a lot too.
5. Gor's mommy's son ie. my cousin but I love him so much he's my beloved gor (: he was the one who introduced me to the world of gaming, pokemon cards, serial dramas and stuff. hahaha.
6. okay I ran out of family members to talk about. so back to Dad. people say I take after him in terms of appearance. oh and height.
7. Mom taught me damn a lot of stuff. I feel bad for upsetting her with my rebellious attitude. she's actually means the world to me.
8. Mei's character is the complete opposite of mine. so when we discuss stuff we usually go super deep with opposing perspectives. which always makes us learn a lot about ourselves, and each other.
9. I'm the eldest child!
10. There's this person i really dislike too much to regard as part of my family, and if given a choice I wouldn't want her to be in my family too, since I didn't learn anything from her at all, and her presence itself only causes stress and discomfort to me. and I really don't like to accommodate people whose personality and ways in life are such that I strongly disagree with.
so yep that's all for today's list!
oh and, @dori_lukey... :/ why does everything seem to be compressed into this short period of time. anw i guess a relationship isn't something you can chart the path or plan for. things that happen to others may not be applicable since we're both so unique in terms of thinking. life is all about having fun, so why worry so much about things in the distant future! i don't care about anything else as long as we like each other. and i really don't like this feeling. it feels so wrong! ):
anw, i've rooted my phone and cos of the freaking signature verification problem i have to install the modded 3e recovery mode. now i'm like doing my TS tutorial while the batch script runs. and it's giving me the freaking timeout error every few minutes. i'm really starting to hate the android system.
on the bright side though, my phone's no longer laggy. if i manage to install the custom rom in the end, i swear i'm gonna customize it like siao. just like what i did to my jailbroken ipad. (: too bad i had to return it in the end.
some updates about my classes.
my PS1101E tutor is damn young and pretty! she's apparently a PhD student from the US, and younger than one of the guys in class somemore! so zai right. i also want do a lot with my life while i'm young, starting from the day i turn twenty which is in next Feb. wish me luck! (:
and TS practical today was damn fun. we were split into groups and given scripts with ~18 scenes. for every scene it's a freeze frame of ongoing events. had lots of fun playing the brick house pig, the straw/wood & the fire haha. i realized got quite a number of potential actresses in my class! like joyce, the goldilock girl etc. i'm like scouting for potential groupmates for the finals play alr! hahaha.
omg just how long is the shell rooting gonna take?! D:
posted by ct
yum yum.
angry!! comp so cui already still dota so much.
angry!! comp so cui already still dota so much.
Day 4: 10 Of Your Favourite Foods
1. Exquisite high-class desserts!!
2. Unagi/Katsu Curry/Oyako Don & soft shell crab maki!!
3. 水塘路 Laksa!!!! this I cannot resist.
4. Foie gras!! omg.
5. Caesar salad / mushroom soup / clam chowder w croutons
6. Black pepper/ salted egg crab
7. 港一's Fried durian & 小鹿排!!! omgomg.
8. Fish & co. best fish & chips.
9. Bread toasted w kaya/butter + tehpeng
10. 烤乳鸽/北京烤鸭 (:
omg can you pls look at the list. if I eat everything within one day I might just die of stroke or something. such a high cholesterol/fat list. but still, what's life without a little indulgence? (:
p.s. treat me to any of these and i'll love you foreverrr. okay except number 9 it's too easy alr haha.
posted by ct
back in my own room
Tuesday, August 30, 2011
there's so little privacy here that i really can't say anything i want to.
Tuesday, August 30, 2011
there's so little privacy here that i really can't say anything i want to.
it's funny though, how i'm unable to talk about it at all.
so here goes Day 2.
Day 2: 10 Things You Do Every Single Day
1. Sleep at some very odd timing.
2. Check fb, gmail & twitter.
3. Look at myself in the mirror.
4. Wear fbts and slippers.
5. Check my phone/Google calendar for events happening that day.
6. Text twinnn and/or lukey.
7. Nua in bed.
8. Watch a show/ play a short game to entertain myself.
9. Make a spontaneous decision to do something.
10. Act cool.
that was completely uninteresting and uninformative. shall add the third one:
Day 3: 10 Things About Your Personality
1. It's hard to convince me ie. i'm stubborn! if I don't believe in something, you can't make me.
2. I'm fun-loving. parties, drinking, games & jokes, etc.
3. Super open-minded. I can accept a lot of stuff people can't accept, though that doesn't necessarily mean I'll be happy accommodating them.
4. Spontaneous. I make decisions on impulse and do random crazy stuff.
5. It takes time for me to warm up to people. once I start sharing my crazy thoughts and beliefs with you & laugh damn loudly that's when I'm starting to treat you like family.
6. I enjoy freedom. no, it's more like a need.
7. Unpredictable? I don't understand how my mind works either.
8. I like to have complete control over my own life.
9. I'm kinda hidden beneath two layers of disguise. first, my face; and second, my strong front.
10. I absolutely hate it when people lie to me. I don't judge; I'm ready for any shocking facts, so why not be honest with me?
alright, that felt much better.
and here's an interesting quote from twinnn's blog:
oh lastly, @dori_lukey i don't care if you think it's a self-fulfilling prophecy or what, this freaking describes me better than i did. so for the module code CT1101E: Introduction to Cherntze's Personality, here's your reading for the week:
Inconsistency and confusion describe the characteristics profile of an Aquarius female. The same goes for her love life too. She is very loyal, but at the same time, she is also a little detached and not extremely emotional. She will be committed and remain faithful too, but do not try to bind her. Let her enjoy her freedom and in return, she will come back to you when she gets tired of her expeditions. Her dreams are very different from that of a normal female and she hums a different tune, which most of us have not even heard of.
An Aquarian female is like a butterfly, which sits on every flower, but belongs to none. She loves her freedom and if you can accept this, she will love you even more. Within her boundless limits, her love will also be limitless. Position and power matter to her more than money and bank balance. If you want her to fall in love with you, be true and honest, not only to others, but also to yourself. You don't need to follow her rules. You can form your own code of ethics, but be sure to live by them.
Passion is not one of the personality traits of Aquarian girl. Rather, her love will be subtle and unassuming. She is intense, but may prefer to be platonic most of the time. Hosting as well as attending parties comes naturally to her and she will always be a social delight. She will trust you completely and will not be unduly suspicious of your activities. You will also not be bothered by too much jealousy or possessiveness on her part. Her trust arises from the fact that before committing, she had dissected your behavior under a microscope.
Only after being convinced of your integrity did she take the next step. Still, if you become unfaithful to her, she will be extremely hurt and is likely to remember the wound for a long time. With an Aquarian female, out of sight means out of mind too. So, make sure to be around here always. She has a very strong will power. If she thinks the relationship is not working and has no chances of improving also, she will break it right away; though doing so may tear her heart into two pieces. Like every Aquarian, she will remember her first love throughout her life.
It's no use getting upset, better be the first love in her life. She will never ever be dishonest in a relationship and even if she indulges in an extra-marital affair, it will end before it even started. She will always try to know your deepest thoughts and secrets, but her own dreams will be beyond your reach. Conversing with an Aquarian female is usually a delight because of her charming manners. Her mind is quite unpredictable and you will find it hard keeping track. She will live in the present, then suddenly be wistful about yesterday and then, become enthusiastic about tomorrow.
She may talk about fairies one day and discard elves as humbug, the other. Never look down on her or she might never look upto you. She respects you and will expect the same in return. As mothers, Aquarian women tend to be very loving and caring. Though in the beginning, they may be a little nervous about the whole idea of motherhood. But once they become comfortable with it, it will come to them naturally. An Aquarius female may find it difficult to express her love in the form of hugs and kisses and you will have to teach her that. She will never overburden the kids with protection.
At the same time, she will always be a patient listener to their childhood and adolescent problems. Teaching them discipline will also be your responsibility. However, for all this to happen you will have to convince her to get married and this certainly isn't an easy job. You will also have to teach her romance, since expressing emotions does not come too easily to her. She will happily hold your hand and walk besides you, but don't expect her to gaze into your eyes for hours at a stretch.
Don't smother your Aquarian girl with too much closeness, she needs her space and will give you, yours too. Things like suspicion, possessiveness, chauvinism and criticism turn her off. Just be nice to her odd bunch of friends and she will warmly welcome yours into the house. Make use of her intuition and insight, it may help you in solving a problem or two. It may seem like wishful thinking now, but then, remember she looks in the future. Hold her hand and she will let you see the future too, where both of you are cozily living together.
thanks for reading. XOXO! (:
Day 3: 10 Things About Your Personality
1. It's hard to convince me ie. i'm stubborn! if I don't believe in something, you can't make me.
2. I'm fun-loving. parties, drinking, games & jokes, etc.
3. Super open-minded. I can accept a lot of stuff people can't accept, though that doesn't necessarily mean I'll be happy accommodating them.
4. Spontaneous. I make decisions on impulse and do random crazy stuff.
5. It takes time for me to warm up to people. once I start sharing my crazy thoughts and beliefs with you & laugh damn loudly that's when I'm starting to treat you like family.
6. I enjoy freedom. no, it's more like a need.
7. Unpredictable? I don't understand how my mind works either.
8. I like to have complete control over my own life.
9. I'm kinda hidden beneath two layers of disguise. first, my face; and second, my strong front.
10. I absolutely hate it when people lie to me. I don't judge; I'm ready for any shocking facts, so why not be honest with me?
alright, that felt much better.
and here's an interesting quote from twinnn's blog:
maybe cos we are DAMN alike and we tell each other everything (almost i think)?hahahaha. i was super amused can. @dori_lukey here's another indirect mention for you! i like you alot anyways so no worries (:
haha we are alike EXCEPT for our taste in guys! heh.
our taste is really... quite different i guess.
haha so sorry to Mr CT'S-BOYFRIEND.
oh lastly, @dori_lukey i don't care if you think it's a self-fulfilling prophecy or what, this freaking describes me better than i did. so for the module code CT1101E: Introduction to Cherntze's Personality, here's your reading for the week:
Inconsistency and confusion describe the characteristics profile of an Aquarius female. The same goes for her love life too. She is very loyal, but at the same time, she is also a little detached and not extremely emotional. She will be committed and remain faithful too, but do not try to bind her. Let her enjoy her freedom and in return, she will come back to you when she gets tired of her expeditions. Her dreams are very different from that of a normal female and she hums a different tune, which most of us have not even heard of.
An Aquarian female is like a butterfly, which sits on every flower, but belongs to none. She loves her freedom and if you can accept this, she will love you even more. Within her boundless limits, her love will also be limitless. Position and power matter to her more than money and bank balance. If you want her to fall in love with you, be true and honest, not only to others, but also to yourself. You don't need to follow her rules. You can form your own code of ethics, but be sure to live by them.
Passion is not one of the personality traits of Aquarian girl. Rather, her love will be subtle and unassuming. She is intense, but may prefer to be platonic most of the time. Hosting as well as attending parties comes naturally to her and she will always be a social delight. She will trust you completely and will not be unduly suspicious of your activities. You will also not be bothered by too much jealousy or possessiveness on her part. Her trust arises from the fact that before committing, she had dissected your behavior under a microscope.
Only after being convinced of your integrity did she take the next step. Still, if you become unfaithful to her, she will be extremely hurt and is likely to remember the wound for a long time. With an Aquarian female, out of sight means out of mind too. So, make sure to be around here always. She has a very strong will power. If she thinks the relationship is not working and has no chances of improving also, she will break it right away; though doing so may tear her heart into two pieces. Like every Aquarian, she will remember her first love throughout her life.
It's no use getting upset, better be the first love in her life. She will never ever be dishonest in a relationship and even if she indulges in an extra-marital affair, it will end before it even started. She will always try to know your deepest thoughts and secrets, but her own dreams will be beyond your reach. Conversing with an Aquarian female is usually a delight because of her charming manners. Her mind is quite unpredictable and you will find it hard keeping track. She will live in the present, then suddenly be wistful about yesterday and then, become enthusiastic about tomorrow.
She may talk about fairies one day and discard elves as humbug, the other. Never look down on her or she might never look upto you. She respects you and will expect the same in return. As mothers, Aquarian women tend to be very loving and caring. Though in the beginning, they may be a little nervous about the whole idea of motherhood. But once they become comfortable with it, it will come to them naturally. An Aquarius female may find it difficult to express her love in the form of hugs and kisses and you will have to teach her that. She will never overburden the kids with protection.
At the same time, she will always be a patient listener to their childhood and adolescent problems. Teaching them discipline will also be your responsibility. However, for all this to happen you will have to convince her to get married and this certainly isn't an easy job. You will also have to teach her romance, since expressing emotions does not come too easily to her. She will happily hold your hand and walk besides you, but don't expect her to gaze into your eyes for hours at a stretch.
Don't smother your Aquarian girl with too much closeness, she needs her space and will give you, yours too. Things like suspicion, possessiveness, chauvinism and criticism turn her off. Just be nice to her odd bunch of friends and she will warmly welcome yours into the house. Make use of her intuition and insight, it may help you in solving a problem or two. It may seem like wishful thinking now, but then, remember she looks in the future. Hold her hand and she will let you see the future too, where both of you are cozily living together.
thanks for reading. XOXO! (:
posted by ct
start of something new
Monday, August 29, 2011
im not happy!
firstly because someone's sleeping when i'm wide awake, and secondly because the weather's so freaking awesome for sleeping and i'm wide awake. so unfair.
it's a long weekend since i have mondays off, but i've already completed my readings so i thought i should blog. but im totally out of inspiration!! >:( i guess there's only so much inspiration for blogging in the same space and some frequent blogger is sucking it all up. hmph. haha okay i shall stop complaining abt luke behind his back. which is true literally btw.
which reminds me, i rmb when i first entered JC i was already thinking 'omg why do ppl still play dota in JC?!' and now... well i don't know what to say. as jason puts it, there are lots of '20+ years old kids' around. not to say that the concept itself isn't cute, but when i have to wait for creeps to slowly reach the frozen throne/world tree round after round, with occasional fatal errors calling for remakes, it's pretty damn sian. then again, maybe i'm biased after watching so many rounds of dota.
i tend to do cheesy stuff out of boredom. i used to hate these kind of stuff cos i thought one should blog only when there's sth to rant/bitch/complain about. but things have changed. so here you go.
DAY 1: 10 THINGS ABOUT YOUR APPEARANCE
1. Clothes: used to love the punk-rock style & bought damn a lot of black chain-y & skull-ish accessories. nowadays i just dress like a normal girl.
2. Face: like my eyes esp lower lashes.
3. Hair: dyed it orange two years ago but it turned out to be too-orange-for-school so i dyed it black the next day. ever since then it's kinda off-black. gonna dye it some outrageous colour soon.
4. Height: my dad's side has the tall genes and i was growing tall so fast everyone thought i was gonna hit model height. alas my sec sch life was so hedonistic my height plateaued at some 165cm. then again i think i'm tall enough. so no complaints here.
5. Smile: oh i have dimples!
6. Piercings/Tattoos: none, & never will have. don't want to mutilate my body.
7. Toenails: painted ORANGE at the moment (:
8. Collarbone: love it.
9. Face shape: ppl keep saying my chin is too sharp.
10. Figure: I'm okay with it. plan to dance till I get a killer bod. okay kidding.
I can almost hear the 'perasan!!' already. so i'm gonna give in to temptation & run over to eat someone up. pardon me.
you know you love me;
XOXO.
Monday, August 29, 2011
im not happy!
firstly because someone's sleeping when i'm wide awake, and secondly because the weather's so freaking awesome for sleeping and i'm wide awake. so unfair.
it's a long weekend since i have mondays off, but i've already completed my readings so i thought i should blog. but im totally out of inspiration!! >:( i guess there's only so much inspiration for blogging in the same space and some frequent blogger is sucking it all up. hmph. haha okay i shall stop complaining abt luke behind his back. which is true literally btw.
which reminds me, i rmb when i first entered JC i was already thinking 'omg why do ppl still play dota in JC?!' and now... well i don't know what to say. as jason puts it, there are lots of '20+ years old kids' around. not to say that the concept itself isn't cute, but when i have to wait for creeps to slowly reach the frozen throne/world tree round after round, with occasional fatal errors calling for remakes, it's pretty damn sian. then again, maybe i'm biased after watching so many rounds of dota.
i tend to do cheesy stuff out of boredom. i used to hate these kind of stuff cos i thought one should blog only when there's sth to rant/bitch/complain about. but things have changed. so here you go.
DAY 1: 10 THINGS ABOUT YOUR APPEARANCE
1. Clothes: used to love the punk-rock style & bought damn a lot of black chain-y & skull-ish accessories. nowadays i just dress like a normal girl.
2. Face: like my eyes esp lower lashes.
3. Hair: dyed it orange two years ago but it turned out to be too-orange-for-school so i dyed it black the next day. ever since then it's kinda off-black. gonna dye it some outrageous colour soon.
4. Height: my dad's side has the tall genes and i was growing tall so fast everyone thought i was gonna hit model height. alas my sec sch life was so hedonistic my height plateaued at some 165cm. then again i think i'm tall enough. so no complaints here.
5. Smile: oh i have dimples!
6. Piercings/Tattoos: none, & never will have. don't want to mutilate my body.
7. Toenails: painted ORANGE at the moment (:
8. Collarbone: love it.
9. Face shape: ppl keep saying my chin is too sharp.
10. Figure: I'm okay with it. plan to dance till I get a killer bod. okay kidding.
I can almost hear the 'perasan!!' already. so i'm gonna give in to temptation & run over to eat someone up. pardon me.
you know you love me;
XOXO.
posted by ct
theories
Tuesday, August 23, 2011
kinda relieved that my blog is not so high profile (unlike someone's!) and that i can still blog to my heart's content.
Tuesday, August 23, 2011
kinda relieved that my blog is not so high profile (unlike someone's!) and that i can still blog to my heart's content.
the way i see it, if u like someone u can't just sit there and wait for something to happen. that's why i've decided to grab that half-extended hand and offer my smile. well, i suppose girls don't usually do that. but i really couldn't care less for mind games & wasting time wondering if the other person likes you back.
if u like someone but u're too scared to make a move, may i say that cowardice would be one of the traits that weighs u down in the eligibility ladder. nonchalance too. smart girls aren't interested in guys who act cool.
and now i know what's my worst mistake of the year. i absolutely hate conforming to invisible boxes / play areas, and i only abide by the rules i concur with. but. who knew our tastes were so similar?
on a side note, i realized news don't travel fast in hall.. they sort of shoot up to the sky, explode into a dazzling myriad of colorful copies, fly back down & go right into the brains of other hall residents. that's probably why certain ppl point upwards & insist they got all the latest gossips from 'God'. good for the christians then cos 'God' is certainly in EH.
studies-wise, i'm having serious difficulties mugging the friggin' Field of Drama. i've been chewing on it since last week, trying my best to ingest all the technical terms, BUT i guess my brain just couldn't register the fact that DRAMA CAN ALSO GET SO BORING. omfg it's a nightmare. guess i'll just have to live with it though. luke's cognitive psych textbook is much more mindfucking than mine.
and why would anyone think that im very banana?! no no im a uber cheena person and super proud of it. i love chinese writing & all my greatest accomplishments are in that field. even though i think my asian values have kinda depleted.. having lived in sg for so many years and exposed to such an excess of american culture. so i have a set of firm beliefs on my own. it's somewhere in between i guess.
oh on a random note. i actually got ask mom before like '妈你为什么帮我取这个名字' and she would go 'orh 因为怀你的时候喝很多橙汁 mah 哈哈' and i'd feel like punching her. lame woman. then again, i'm grateful to her for giving me such a unique name. at least up till now i haven't found another person whose name sounds like orange juice yet.
posted by ct
wrt living life
Thursday, August 18, 2011
Nov 23, 2009 [Archive]
hey. open up!
IF you think you're fake,
and the real you is hidden beneath layers of disguise.
IF what you show everyone, everyday
is that piece of skin you stole from someone else,
full of hidden needles that'll hurt ppl who get close to you,
that you use as a disguise to hide ur true and harmless self;;
IF your real emotions are not what you show on ur face,
and it's because you want to seem unpredictable, mysterious,
or because you don't want to invest your real emotions
lest they get hurt by others;;
IF you want to be the one hurting everyone
so that you can be protected from harm
and curl up in a ball whenever someone comes closer
to see you for what you really are;;
and IF you are always watching from afar,
like a spectator.
learn to tell the truth and share the secret.
no matter how hard it is.
when there's a listener,
who gives sincere feedback without judgement,
everything's gonna be fine.
you have full view of the map
you see a noob guy sneaking up on a pro
if you were playing you could easily snipe both guys from afar.
the view was perfect.
but you can only watch as the pro kills off the noob,
and well, of course he gets all the glory.
oh and -
they don't even know you were there on the scene.
you can be a spectator for your whole life
and at the end of it you'll realize that
you haven't lived a life at all.
Jan 6, 2010 [Archive]
you enter JC, orientation zooms past like a dream, you start getting yourself into countless random committees, you tank everything while everyone else slack, blocks and lecture tests come & go like nobody's business, you organize damn alot of random shit, you go for OCIP, you do research, you struggle in your studies, suddenly A levels come, then you graduate.
Thursday, August 18, 2011
Nov 23, 2009 [Archive]
hey. open up!
IF you think you're fake,
and the real you is hidden beneath layers of disguise.
IF what you show everyone, everyday
is that piece of skin you stole from someone else,
full of hidden needles that'll hurt ppl who get close to you,
that you use as a disguise to hide ur true and harmless self;;
IF your real emotions are not what you show on ur face,
and it's because you want to seem unpredictable, mysterious,
or because you don't want to invest your real emotions
lest they get hurt by others;;
IF you want to be the one hurting everyone
so that you can be protected from harm
and curl up in a ball whenever someone comes closer
to see you for what you really are;;
and IF you are always watching from afar,
like a spectator.
learn to tell the truth and share the secret.
no matter how hard it is.
when there's a listener,
who gives sincere feedback without judgement,
everything's gonna be fine.
you have full view of the map
you see a noob guy sneaking up on a pro
if you were playing you could easily snipe both guys from afar.
the view was perfect.
but you can only watch as the pro kills off the noob,
and well, of course he gets all the glory.
oh and -
they don't even know you were there on the scene.
you can be a spectator for your whole life
and at the end of it you'll realize that
you haven't lived a life at all.
Jan 6, 2010 [Archive]
you enter JC, orientation zooms past like a dream, you start getting yourself into countless random committees, you tank everything while everyone else slack, blocks and lecture tests come & go like nobody's business, you organize damn alot of random shit, you go for OCIP, you do research, you struggle in your studies, suddenly A levels come, then you graduate.
posted by ct
wrt plastic surgery
god or whoever created human has always been fair.
there are some people who are blessed with both looks and brains.
some with extra talents as well.
but the talents generally come from hard work.
and perhaps if you look beyond the looks and brains
the person may not have a kind heart.
or maybe he or she has some other hidden bad qualities, who knows.
most famous writers or scientists generally have damn sad backgrounds.
like dead parents or social rejection and stuff like that.
if you wanna be famous it's there have to be sacrifices.
on the other hand.
i dun think skincare or eating good will have much impact on looks.
except that maybe if you starve too much u won't look as healthy.
i think bird nest also not much use, unlike what some actresses say.
my dad sells it so i get to eat them since i was young, but too bad no diff haha.
i think the effects of plastic surgery extends beyond the improved looks.
if you know what i mean.
finally. no one can ever deny that looks is not important.
cos if that's so, try uninstalling all the mirrors at home and go to sch without combing your hair. you will then be able to see for yourself the significance of looks in the eyes of fellow human beings.
i think yihong may clap for my post.
even though i think it's all been said before.
"I don't plan to grow old gracefully. I plan to have face-lifts until my ears meet." - Rita Rudner
"One popular new plastic surgery technique is called lip grafting, or 'fat recycling' wherein fat cells are removed from one part of your body that is too large, such as your buttocks, and injected into your lips; people will then be literally kissing ass." - Dave Barry
was reading my old blog and realized that some of the posts are actually kinda cool. i had so much time to think about stuff in JC. shall re-post some of them here.
June 27, 2009 [Archive]
June 27, 2009 [Archive]
god or whoever created human has always been fair.
there are some people who are blessed with both looks and brains.
some with extra talents as well.
but the talents generally come from hard work.
and perhaps if you look beyond the looks and brains
the person may not have a kind heart.
or maybe he or she has some other hidden bad qualities, who knows.
most famous writers or scientists generally have damn sad backgrounds.
like dead parents or social rejection and stuff like that.
if you wanna be famous it's there have to be sacrifices.
on the other hand.
i dun think skincare or eating good will have much impact on looks.
except that maybe if you starve too much u won't look as healthy.
i think bird nest also not much use, unlike what some actresses say.
my dad sells it so i get to eat them since i was young, but too bad no diff haha.
i think the effects of plastic surgery extends beyond the improved looks.
if you know what i mean.
finally. no one can ever deny that looks is not important.
cos if that's so, try uninstalling all the mirrors at home and go to sch without combing your hair. you will then be able to see for yourself the significance of looks in the eyes of fellow human beings.
i think yihong may clap for my post.
even though i think it's all been said before.
"I don't plan to grow old gracefully. I plan to have face-lifts until my ears meet." - Rita Rudner
"One popular new plastic surgery technique is called lip grafting, or 'fat recycling' wherein fat cells are removed from one part of your body that is too large, such as your buttocks, and injected into your lips; people will then be literally kissing ass." - Dave Barry
posted by ct
audition
Tuesday, August 16, 2011
yesterday was such an eventful day! (:
firstly. i realized that i can't stop k-ing once i start! it's really an addiction man. haha. no time limit = i can really k non-stop 24 hours! until my voice dies or sth. haha.
not even gonna talk about the choir audition, the singing part was plain horrific cos of my voice! it sounded so super strenuous. so imma say bye to whichever group that requires solo singing alr. and it's been so damn long since my piano grade 6 practical exam which was like in... P5?! omg. and i guess i really need some vocal training to strengthen my voice for future k sessions!
then.. skip cos i don't wanna talk about it here.
and i shall be a guai girl for now and wait for the decisions!
Tuesday, August 16, 2011
yesterday was such an eventful day! (:
firstly. i realized that i can't stop k-ing once i start! it's really an addiction man. haha. no time limit = i can really k non-stop 24 hours! until my voice dies or sth. haha.
not even gonna talk about the choir audition, the singing part was plain horrific cos of my voice! it sounded so super strenuous. so imma say bye to whichever group that requires solo singing alr. and it's been so damn long since my piano grade 6 practical exam which was like in... P5?! omg. and i guess i really need some vocal training to strengthen my voice for future k sessions!
then.. skip cos i don't wanna talk about it here.
and i shall be a guai girl for now and wait for the decisions!
posted by ct
i need some serious htht.
Monday, August 15, 2011
such a pain in the ass.
Monday, August 15, 2011
i realized that for every phase of my life girl politics have been kinda inevitable. maybe it's cos i've been in all kinds of leadership positions before, and there'll always be this other girl competing with me. she'd be smart and pretty.. well sometimes not, but definitely cunning, manipulative and has some power acting skills.
 |
| fb drama. |
such a pain in the ass.
in front of girl friends i like to hang out with i'm usually completely honest about my opinions and stuff. i'd crack mean jokes, reveal my vain / lustful / crazy self, bitch about girls who piss me off and then compare our eye candies. both IRL & kpop.
if u're not someone i deem close enough i'll just keep all my opinions to myself. so if i don't do all that with u, it's probably cos i haven't warmed up to you yet.
i love being honest & straightfoward. and the feeling of not being able to say what i want to & having to hold everything in, right now, is really freaking me out.
HELP-
i love being honest & straightfoward. and the feeling of not being able to say what i want to & having to hold everything in, right now, is really freaking me out.
HELP-
posted by ct
DANCE x SCHOOL
Saturday, August 13, 2011
omg DANCE!! ♥
now that i think about it, most of my besties are dancers. like yihong's a modern dancer, chenyi is into k hiphop and so on, plus recently cos i hang out with the rag dancers so much i think it's really getting to me.
im actually thankful that chenyi dragged me for my first k hiphop open class, in which they used the song i was absolutely in love with!
and not too long after i joined rag dance cos i thought it'd be fun. and it turns out to be truer than ever! loved it and really enjoyed myself (:
i like learning a full choreo. i like practising the same dance steps over and over again so i can eventually perfect it. so open classes don't really appeal to me much. i'd prefer the mtv classes esp when i love the song.
but today i went for my first open class at o school and i actually kinda loved it haha. even though the warm up was damn hiong and my butt/thigh's now aching cos of all the leg twisting in the choreo, i still enjoyed myself in the lesson. really happy that i was able to follow the choreo and execute the steps correctly - i was expecting it to be much harder to follow! (: must thank twin too cos she's also quite good so got the peer pressure to push myself harder :p
WASSUP YO! the song is still stuck in my head! so nice to dance to.
i think for now i still lack is the feel/attitude. need to work on it. maybe if i go for more classes it'd get better? haha. oh after the open class i was so happy that i immediately signed up for the hiphop course. which is also taught by terence i think! i kinda like his style anws. cos i can do the fast-slow thing! :D but must really prac the leg twisting ah.
okay enough about dance. i think i didn't really blog about the past few days after rag? so here goes.
first lecture i attended was the TS1101E one, on thurs morning. i only slept for ard 3 hours before waking up for the lecture, but the ultra-beng lecturer managed to keep me amused and awake for the whole of the lecture, with his frequent usage of hokkien & video clips which are actually interesting. so no prob w the lectures. what im worried about is the practical lesson, which i presume is gonna involve a lot of impromptu acting! i think i can do method acting, but i can't really do the super exaggerated and theatrical type of acting, ie. the movie kind but not the theatre kind. see how.
i don't really wanna recount how i kicked on a kerb accidentally and almost broke my toe - damn horrifying experience. so skip.
then on friday i went for my first PS2248 lecture? the whole classroom was filled with experienced-looking year 2s and several angmoh faces. the entire atmosphere was really different from that of the level 1 mods, and the lecturer just jumped right into the content. oh the prof is from china, the things he teach are about china, but he has to teach in english -.- so stupid right. i had to mentally translate all the english terms back to chinese. then came the scary part - the seniors started asking questions that i could understand but im dead sure i won't be able to phrase so cheemly. i didn't know there were singaporeans who're so interested in/ familiar with chinese politics man. with all those seniors around, i think i really can't count on my class participation for this mod alr. best of luck to me.
after that i ate lunch with yihong & shiyu! yihong dress until damn AA & still complain that ppl don't look at her enough! gotta tell her that if u're pretty ppl will definitely be stealing glances at you one so don't worry. but i think she alr knows that. maybe she was secretly basking in the joy of it but just commented otherwise. hahaha.
then came the genes & soc lecture. the content was SO FREAKING BORING omg. the lecturer was kinda lame-enthu, but everything covered before in A level alr!! i think i can happily skip the lectures for the following few weeks liao. if not i'll just go there and mug my PS notes haha. it's 2 freaking hours. about halfway through i was struggling to keep myself awake alr. it was so bad that i had to play brainless games like fruit slice and yooninja on my phone.
okay enough about school. next up: POST RAG DINNER.
i think there's this general segregation between raggers & rag dancers, except for a few individuals. but it's okay i'll eventually get to know the ppl i actually need to know. (: ate subway, drank root beer and played a bit of four kings. i felt kinda guilty during the game that i actually added a bit of liquor to my cup. after all the crazy drinking games we went back to B lounge to htht & play mafia!
i don't even want to comment on the mafia game anymore! damn suay haha. then came the 'truth or truth' session. i think i was so honest when answering the questions i scared even myself. but at least i got it out of my chest.
and of course i won't tell u!
Saturday, August 13, 2011
omg DANCE!! ♥
now that i think about it, most of my besties are dancers. like yihong's a modern dancer, chenyi is into k hiphop and so on, plus recently cos i hang out with the rag dancers so much i think it's really getting to me.
im actually thankful that chenyi dragged me for my first k hiphop open class, in which they used the song i was absolutely in love with!
 |
| her whisper is the lucifer; |
and not too long after i joined rag dance cos i thought it'd be fun. and it turns out to be truer than ever! loved it and really enjoyed myself (:
i like learning a full choreo. i like practising the same dance steps over and over again so i can eventually perfect it. so open classes don't really appeal to me much. i'd prefer the mtv classes esp when i love the song.
but today i went for my first open class at o school and i actually kinda loved it haha. even though the warm up was damn hiong and my butt/thigh's now aching cos of all the leg twisting in the choreo, i still enjoyed myself in the lesson. really happy that i was able to follow the choreo and execute the steps correctly - i was expecting it to be much harder to follow! (: must thank twin too cos she's also quite good so got the peer pressure to push myself harder :p
WASSUP YO! the song is still stuck in my head! so nice to dance to.
i think for now i still lack is the feel/attitude. need to work on it. maybe if i go for more classes it'd get better? haha. oh after the open class i was so happy that i immediately signed up for the hiphop course. which is also taught by terence i think! i kinda like his style anws. cos i can do the fast-slow thing! :D but must really prac the leg twisting ah.
okay enough about dance. i think i didn't really blog about the past few days after rag? so here goes.
first lecture i attended was the TS1101E one, on thurs morning. i only slept for ard 3 hours before waking up for the lecture, but the ultra-beng lecturer managed to keep me amused and awake for the whole of the lecture, with his frequent usage of hokkien & video clips which are actually interesting. so no prob w the lectures. what im worried about is the practical lesson, which i presume is gonna involve a lot of impromptu acting! i think i can do method acting, but i can't really do the super exaggerated and theatrical type of acting, ie. the movie kind but not the theatre kind. see how.
i don't really wanna recount how i kicked on a kerb accidentally and almost broke my toe - damn horrifying experience. so skip.
then on friday i went for my first PS2248 lecture? the whole classroom was filled with experienced-looking year 2s and several angmoh faces. the entire atmosphere was really different from that of the level 1 mods, and the lecturer just jumped right into the content. oh the prof is from china, the things he teach are about china, but he has to teach in english -.- so stupid right. i had to mentally translate all the english terms back to chinese. then came the scary part - the seniors started asking questions that i could understand but im dead sure i won't be able to phrase so cheemly. i didn't know there were singaporeans who're so interested in/ familiar with chinese politics man. with all those seniors around, i think i really can't count on my class participation for this mod alr. best of luck to me.
 |
| something i've definitely gotta learn. |
after that i ate lunch with yihong & shiyu! yihong dress until damn AA & still complain that ppl don't look at her enough! gotta tell her that if u're pretty ppl will definitely be stealing glances at you one so don't worry. but i think she alr knows that. maybe she was secretly basking in the joy of it but just commented otherwise. hahaha.
then came the genes & soc lecture. the content was SO FREAKING BORING omg. the lecturer was kinda lame-enthu, but everything covered before in A level alr!! i think i can happily skip the lectures for the following few weeks liao. if not i'll just go there and mug my PS notes haha. it's 2 freaking hours. about halfway through i was struggling to keep myself awake alr. it was so bad that i had to play brainless games like fruit slice and yooninja on my phone.
okay enough about school. next up: POST RAG DINNER.
i think there's this general segregation between raggers & rag dancers, except for a few individuals. but it's okay i'll eventually get to know the ppl i actually need to know. (: ate subway, drank root beer and played a bit of four kings. i felt kinda guilty during the game that i actually added a bit of liquor to my cup. after all the crazy drinking games we went back to B lounge to htht & play mafia!
i don't even want to comment on the mafia game anymore! damn suay haha. then came the 'truth or truth' session. i think i was so honest when answering the questions i scared even myself. but at least i got it out of my chest.
and of course i won't tell u!
posted by ct